Banana Raspberry Bread
1 (very ripe) banana 1 ½ cup self rising flour
¾ cup raspberries (thawed, unsweetened) ½ teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup of sugar ¼ teaspoon nutmeg
2 eggs (or 6 tablespoons of egg whites)
½ cup vegetable oil
½ teaspoon vanilla extract
1. Preheat oven at 325 degrees F.
2. In a large bowl, mash banana. Add in eggs, sugar, vanilla, and oil. Fold in raspberries.
3. In a smaller bowl combine the flour, nutmeg, and cinnamon.
4. Mix in dry ingredients in parts to the wet ingredients.
5. Pour into greased or lined muffin tins or loaf pan. Bake until golden browned.
If making muffins, approximately 16-18 minutes. If making the loaf, 50-60 minutes.
**Recipe makes one large loaf or 12 muffins.**Recipe makes one large loaf or 12 muffins.
In the future, I am planning on expirementing with lower sugar and lower fat versions... but those have yet to be "perfected." :-P
Monday, October 8, 2012
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Picture Perfect
During a recent fit on insomnia, I was watching Ugly Betty on Netflix and one of the characters said
something that really struck me. It was something along the lines of, “Perfect
may not look the way you thought it would.” I caught
myself almost responding “AMEN!” to the television. (If you know me, you realize this is quite a testament
to how I felt. I am constantly picking at friends, and especially my mother, for
talking back to the TV.)
I know that “perfect” has changed a lot over the years. The more I see and experience life, my image of "perfect" becomes less cookie cutter and more “perfect for Brandi.” "Tall, Dark, and Handsome" has morphed into “Smart,
Kind, and Funny” and “power and wealth” have transformed into “comfortable and
loved.” One thing is for sure, my life is nowhere near
what I thought it would be, and I couldn’t be happier about that!
In ten years, or ten days for that matter, I am sure “perfect” will look a lot different
than it does now, but it will be exactly what it needs to be. I am thankful for the perfect blessings of today,
tomorrow, and every day. So, yes, “perfect”
may not look like what I imagined it would, but that is a good thing.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Periwinkle
Love is a many splendored thing.
Not only is it splendiferous (yes, I said splendiferous… it’s a word, spell check says so) It
is funny what can spark it and what can squelch it. It is a pretty great feeling when you get that
first spark, but what is even better is when it comes out of nowhere. It is amazing how a shared laugh at an obscure
reference or a present of a tiny bottle of shark bubbles can instantaneously
change how you see someone.
Love, whether doomed to quickly dissipate or to grow indefinitely, is
always good. The spark of a new romance
can be just what you need to jump back into life reminding you of the thrill of
living in the moment. The roller coaster
of soaring high on the tiniest of hopes pared with the plummeting depths of
dashed dreams can be amazing reminders of the vivid world we live in and
routinely tune out.
It will send your world spinning and make you question what took you so
long to get there. Sometimes the ride is
fantastically thrilling and sometimes it just makes you want to hurl. It is all about timing. Now,
being a princess, I am not a fan of relinquishing control and I still contend
that if you want something, you can make your own timing. But even I must admit that some things are
out of my control. SA has told me more times than I can count, “Timing is
everything and timing is a bitch.” I don’t
think he meant it was a female dog either…
Every now and again, though, we luck out. The timing is right and we get to hold on to
our hopes and watch dreams grow. Sometimes
the dreams change and, sometimes, if you are REALLY lucky, reality surpasses everything
you had hoped for.
Category 5 Temper Tantrums
With all the rainbows and marshmallows that seem to come out of my
proverbial mouth I know it can seem a bit hard to believe that I am not
completely in denial of all things real and painful in the world. I would like to take this opportunity to say,
yes, even princesses have selfish, pessimistic thoughts and, on occasion, prone to full on
Category 5 hissy fits. JJ and SA are
painfully aware that these do exist and will testify that I go slightly insane
on occasion.
Sometimes, I just do not express my thoughts and feelings very well. I
try, but in a world where words filled with selfish and vapid meanings flow so
abundantly, it can feel impossible to make someone listen when you have
something real to share. I maintain that
the reasons behind these fits are valid, but I admit, my reactions are not always
the most reasonable. Thankfully, these fits are few and far between; maybe not
quite as far apart as I would prefer, but still not the norm.
The truth is my life is pretty fantastic. I have some of the most amazing people who
have ever existed regularly interacting in my life. I am constantly surrounded by people who have
seen all the less than attractive parts of me and not only accept me but still
choose to love me and welcome me into their lives. These are people who may not know what
color my eyes are, but can describe my “true colors” better than I could ever
begin to express.
I don’t know what I have done to deserve such love, but I am so very
thankful and I am trying very hard to be the type of princess worthy of these
gifts.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Magical Gifts
On occasion, even a princess can be surprised by the magic in her world. Have you ever had that feeling of finding a treasure that is exactly what you never knew you always wanted? Magic quietly at work, shaping and preparing for the perfect time to unveil its gift of love and wonder embodied. If you haven’t experienced this, let’s just say it is pretty amazing.
I have stumbled upon these kinds of gifts in my life a couple times and each time I am always taken by surprise. The world is beautiful and magical place, if you know what to look for. Have faith and *try* to be patient, wonderfully unexpected and breath-taking gifts await you, on that, I give you my Royal Word.
Sometimes, the gift can be a little thing like finding that perfect dress at a fantastic price in a size smaller than you thought you were. Or, it could be getting lost on a road trip and cresting a hill just in time to see a watercolor sunset that could only have been hand-painted by God himself, suddenly makes “lost” relative. It might even be the last minute change of plans that leads to a chance meeting of old friends complete with laughing so hard that tears roll down the cheek. These seemingly small gifts frequently add color and sparkle to life.
Sometimes, though, the gift is bigger…
I have stumbled upon these kinds of gifts in my life a couple times and each time I am always taken by surprise. The world is beautiful and magical place, if you know what to look for. Have faith and *try* to be patient, wonderfully unexpected and breath-taking gifts await you, on that, I give you my Royal Word.
Sometimes, the gift can be a little thing like finding that perfect dress at a fantastic price in a size smaller than you thought you were. Or, it could be getting lost on a road trip and cresting a hill just in time to see a watercolor sunset that could only have been hand-painted by God himself, suddenly makes “lost” relative. It might even be the last minute change of plans that leads to a chance meeting of old friends complete with laughing so hard that tears roll down the cheek. These seemingly small gifts frequently add color and sparkle to life.
Sometimes, though, the gift is bigger…
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Princess Presents
 |
| My new Tiara! I think I rock it, what do you think? |
My Monday was made significantly better this week by a surprise present from a friend. This princess came home from work to find a "Bling" package from Amazon.com in her mailbox. Upon opening the box, I discovered, much to my delight, I had been gifted with a brand new tiara!!! The gray pups can attest to my glee by the high pitched squeal of delight that only they could hear.
Danny, You done good, kid, you done good!
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
As All Good Fairy Tales Begin...
Once upon a time there was a group of adventurous and good hearted young knights and fair maidens (as well as a Princess) who had recently started cultivating the bonds of friendship. This newly formed band of friends began their story with lots of little adventures and celebrations. One such celebration was a Gala to benefit the less fortunate families of the kingdom. With all of the knights in their best tunics and the princesses and ladies in fine gowns, the merriment of good food and drink, merry minstrels, and dancing ensued.
Towards the end of the evening, a contest of sorts was begun to see who might best provide support for these families in need. The friends rallied their resources and were able to promise a substantial amount to feed the hungry and clothe the poor of their kingdom. At the end of the contest, this group of friends found themselves rewarded for their giving hearts with a week vacation at a private cabin in the Smokey Mountains.
Preparations were made and a date for the expedition was set. But not all of the friends were destined to make this journey. One by one, the anticipated adventurers dropped out of the band of travelers until only three were remaining for the grand adventure. Sir JJ, the Valiant; Sir SA, the strong; and Princess Brandi set out on a week-long adventure that would forever change the course of their lives.
The small band of adventurers traveled far and wide taking in the sights of the foreign mountainous land. They trekked through the wilderness to see breath taking waterfalls, wandered through small villages getting to know the villagers, traveled many miles to see the beautiful local castle, explored the gathered wonders of the aquatic world, and ventured on horseback to the heights of the mountains to view the lands from above. They delighted in feeding carrots to the local donkey wildlife and found merriment playing in the forts and games the children had built. They even engaged in a local customer called "Black Light Mini Golf" which, while agreeable to Princess Brandi and Sir SA, the Strong, the effects on Sir JJ, the Valiant were not so pleasing causing him to avow never to engage in this custom again.
While all of these adventures were exciting and delightful, the true magic of the trip was found in the fireside talks that went on deep into the night. Open and unfiltered sharing of life experiences, views on the world, and struggles of everyday life (as well as a little wine) spurred the friends to grow deeper and deeper in their friendship until setting the beginnings of solid almost unbreakable bonds. By the end of this adventure, Princess Brandi and the Nerds in Shining Armor had been transformed from a band of congenial acquaintances to true friends with a bond unlike any other.
In the words of Sir JJ, the Valiant, "Myeah, see? Myeah!"
Towards the end of the evening, a contest of sorts was begun to see who might best provide support for these families in need. The friends rallied their resources and were able to promise a substantial amount to feed the hungry and clothe the poor of their kingdom. At the end of the contest, this group of friends found themselves rewarded for their giving hearts with a week vacation at a private cabin in the Smokey Mountains.
Preparations were made and a date for the expedition was set. But not all of the friends were destined to make this journey. One by one, the anticipated adventurers dropped out of the band of travelers until only three were remaining for the grand adventure. Sir JJ, the Valiant; Sir SA, the strong; and Princess Brandi set out on a week-long adventure that would forever change the course of their lives.
The small band of adventurers traveled far and wide taking in the sights of the foreign mountainous land. They trekked through the wilderness to see breath taking waterfalls, wandered through small villages getting to know the villagers, traveled many miles to see the beautiful local castle, explored the gathered wonders of the aquatic world, and ventured on horseback to the heights of the mountains to view the lands from above. They delighted in feeding carrots to the local donkey wildlife and found merriment playing in the forts and games the children had built. They even engaged in a local customer called "Black Light Mini Golf" which, while agreeable to Princess Brandi and Sir SA, the Strong, the effects on Sir JJ, the Valiant were not so pleasing causing him to avow never to engage in this custom again.
While all of these adventures were exciting and delightful, the true magic of the trip was found in the fireside talks that went on deep into the night. Open and unfiltered sharing of life experiences, views on the world, and struggles of everyday life (as well as a little wine) spurred the friends to grow deeper and deeper in their friendship until setting the beginnings of solid almost unbreakable bonds. By the end of this adventure, Princess Brandi and the Nerds in Shining Armor had been transformed from a band of congenial acquaintances to true friends with a bond unlike any other.
In the words of Sir JJ, the Valiant, "Myeah, see? Myeah!"
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Iron Princess?
I'm self centered… I really am.
I try not to be. I work at putting myself in other people shoes, trying to see the world a they do, but I am not so good at this. At a party recently I was introducing a couple of friends to another friend and SA kindly chastised me saying, “It’s not all about you, Brandi.” I admitted jokingly that it wasn’t, it was only 85% about me. But the truth is, I am seriously self centered.
I was again reminded of this when, on a nerd adventure, I saw the Avengers not once, but twice, in one week and announced that my favorite superhero from the movie was Iron Man. In a flash of self-awareness, I realized that relating to this character seemed to me to be rather indicative of the fact that, while I may have a good heart, I certainly have a HUGE ego. I mean, seriously… I am a self-proclaimed princess for goodness sake!!!
I am not entirely sure where this gigantic ego comes from, but I don’t think it is something I care for. New item on the List O’ Things To Do, "Increase Humility." Now… should this go before or after "Increase Patience" on the list?
I try not to be. I work at putting myself in other people shoes, trying to see the world a they do, but I am not so good at this. At a party recently I was introducing a couple of friends to another friend and SA kindly chastised me saying, “It’s not all about you, Brandi.” I admitted jokingly that it wasn’t, it was only 85% about me. But the truth is, I am seriously self centered.
I was again reminded of this when, on a nerd adventure, I saw the Avengers not once, but twice, in one week and announced that my favorite superhero from the movie was Iron Man. In a flash of self-awareness, I realized that relating to this character seemed to me to be rather indicative of the fact that, while I may have a good heart, I certainly have a HUGE ego. I mean, seriously… I am a self-proclaimed princess for goodness sake!!!
I am not entirely sure where this gigantic ego comes from, but I don’t think it is something I care for. New item on the List O’ Things To Do, "Increase Humility." Now… should this go before or after "Increase Patience" on the list?
Thursday, May 10, 2012
The Pursuit of Happily Ever After
Anyone who has ever ready a traditional storybook knows that a princess’s life is always described, usually in the last line or two of the story, as “happily ever after.” This most certainly applies to me, regardless of my non-traditional nature. Sometimes, though, “happily ever after” is hard to recognize. It is there, it just likes to play hide and seek. (Life is playful like that.)
Life has a tendency to have abrupt changes in direction, redefining of roles, and cast changes. I don’t do change well, but change happens regardless of whether or not I like it. My life in particular has LOTS of fun twists and turns. Vocational, romantic, medical, and financial changes have been abundant for me in the last three years. There have been many occasions for me to turn blue figuratively and, once, literally.
With every hair-pin turn and gut-wrenching drop, “happily ever after” was still there cleverly disguised. Sometimes it was wrapped up in a bruised ego, or a scary diagnosis. Other times, it hid under a lay-off from work or a broken heart.
Occasionally, it hides so well, that I forget I am a princess and start to believe I am not magical at all. But, with a little help from my Nerds in Shining Armor and of course the Royal Family, I remember in a flash that I AM a princess and all princess get “Happily Ever After,” I just have to find it. So, after a brief (or not so brief) temper-tantrum, I take a deep breath and accept life as it is at the moment. Knowing that, as a princess, I have the power to change the world, or at least how I see it; I actively set out to do exactly that.
I have found that the quickest way to uncover a hiding “happily ever after” is to fully embrace true royalty. I set out to choose to see the good in those who have hurt me, smile on the days that it would be easier to cry because, and to help others do the same. Soon enough, the magic in me kicks in and *POOF* “Happily Ever After!”
Love, Grace, and Kindness is the stuff true royalty strives to embody. This princess endeavors everyday to live up to her royal title, and, on occasion, even manages to succeed. Those are the days that I know, without a doubt; I am living “Happily Ever After.”
Life has a tendency to have abrupt changes in direction, redefining of roles, and cast changes. I don’t do change well, but change happens regardless of whether or not I like it. My life in particular has LOTS of fun twists and turns. Vocational, romantic, medical, and financial changes have been abundant for me in the last three years. There have been many occasions for me to turn blue figuratively and, once, literally.
With every hair-pin turn and gut-wrenching drop, “happily ever after” was still there cleverly disguised. Sometimes it was wrapped up in a bruised ego, or a scary diagnosis. Other times, it hid under a lay-off from work or a broken heart.
Occasionally, it hides so well, that I forget I am a princess and start to believe I am not magical at all. But, with a little help from my Nerds in Shining Armor and of course the Royal Family, I remember in a flash that I AM a princess and all princess get “Happily Ever After,” I just have to find it. So, after a brief (or not so brief) temper-tantrum, I take a deep breath and accept life as it is at the moment. Knowing that, as a princess, I have the power to change the world, or at least how I see it; I actively set out to do exactly that.
I have found that the quickest way to uncover a hiding “happily ever after” is to fully embrace true royalty. I set out to choose to see the good in those who have hurt me, smile on the days that it would be easier to cry because, and to help others do the same. Soon enough, the magic in me kicks in and *POOF* “Happily Ever After!”
Love, Grace, and Kindness is the stuff true royalty strives to embody. This princess endeavors everyday to live up to her royal title, and, on occasion, even manages to succeed. Those are the days that I know, without a doubt; I am living “Happily Ever After.”
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
The Royal Family
In honor of being officially one year older, I thought I might give you a glimpse of the Royal Family this Princess came from.
As I am sure you are aware, Princesses are very special people and have been raised by people even more special. This princess’s family can certainly qualify as “special” in more ways than one and are certainly not your garden variety royalty. Life in their far off magical kingdom is… unconventional. Yes, we’ll go with “unconventional.” Some might even say “weird,” but, that is not necessarily a bad thing.
I was brought up in a family with unconventional values. Those qualities that are not normally encouraged in well behaved and rational children were instead cultivated and nurtured. The royal family placed high value on independent thinking, vivid imaginations, and creativity.
Many afternoon car rides and kitchen table conversations from my childhood were spent playing “What if…” or weaving tales from unlikely perspectives. Sunday afternoons were filled with grand adventures without leaving the backyard. Conversations spanning generations (and sometimes species via dramatic interpretation) creating new and amazing ways to see life and discovering ways to turn the world on its head, at least in theory. All the while, knowing I was loved regardless of the success or failure of any of the crazy ideas I had, just so long as I tried.
Life from this perspective can only be an adventure. Each day is an opportunity to find wonder and excitement. Every conversation has the potential to create and to laugh. Every person met is another chance to change the world as we know it.
The chance to truly live… that is the best birthday present any Princess can be given!
As I am sure you are aware, Princesses are very special people and have been raised by people even more special. This princess’s family can certainly qualify as “special” in more ways than one and are certainly not your garden variety royalty. Life in their far off magical kingdom is… unconventional. Yes, we’ll go with “unconventional.” Some might even say “weird,” but, that is not necessarily a bad thing.
I was brought up in a family with unconventional values. Those qualities that are not normally encouraged in well behaved and rational children were instead cultivated and nurtured. The royal family placed high value on independent thinking, vivid imaginations, and creativity.
Many afternoon car rides and kitchen table conversations from my childhood were spent playing “What if…” or weaving tales from unlikely perspectives. Sunday afternoons were filled with grand adventures without leaving the backyard. Conversations spanning generations (and sometimes species via dramatic interpretation) creating new and amazing ways to see life and discovering ways to turn the world on its head, at least in theory. All the while, knowing I was loved regardless of the success or failure of any of the crazy ideas I had, just so long as I tried.
Life from this perspective can only be an adventure. Each day is an opportunity to find wonder and excitement. Every conversation has the potential to create and to laugh. Every person met is another chance to change the world as we know it.
The chance to truly live… that is the best birthday present any Princess can be given!
Friday, April 27, 2012
Guerrilla Befriending
I have told you about how S.A. and I became friends, now, here is the way JJ and I became friends. *Disclaimer* If you ask him, I am sure he will have an entirely different take on the matter, but he is not the Princess, now, is he?
Like I have said before, princesses meet a lot of people in their day to day lives and I am no different in this respect. I have also said that sometimes it takes time for a person to come into focus; JJ is not one of these people. He announced his presence and made it know he was going to be my friend, regardless of how I felt on the matter. He’s good like that.
Like S.A., I met JJ through the young adults group at my church. He was freshly out of college and setting out to make his mark on the world. While it is true that I met JJ a couple of years before I became friends with him, as I was acquainted with his older brother, prior to this time, our four year age difference put us at significantly different places in life. When JJ graduate from college and started being an “adult” (i.e. having to buy his own toilet paper) it seemed he had a mission in life to make new friends and I was one of the targets.
I am not sure that there was an exact time that I could pinpoint to JJ becoming my friend, he just did. One day he decided that we were friends and “so it was written and so it shall be done.” Game nights, dinner out, movie nights, and barbeques… it was as if he was an activities coordinator for a while until his targets forgot that we weren’t all lifelong friends. His open heart, crazy laugh, and eager acceptance of each of us just as we are made it difficult to do anything other than love him. So… that is what I did.
I am very thankful for his seek and destroy (or befriend as the case may be) approach to making friends; I wouldn’t trade him for anything in the world!
Like I have said before, princesses meet a lot of people in their day to day lives and I am no different in this respect. I have also said that sometimes it takes time for a person to come into focus; JJ is not one of these people. He announced his presence and made it know he was going to be my friend, regardless of how I felt on the matter. He’s good like that.
Like S.A., I met JJ through the young adults group at my church. He was freshly out of college and setting out to make his mark on the world. While it is true that I met JJ a couple of years before I became friends with him, as I was acquainted with his older brother, prior to this time, our four year age difference put us at significantly different places in life. When JJ graduate from college and started being an “adult” (i.e. having to buy his own toilet paper) it seemed he had a mission in life to make new friends and I was one of the targets.
I am not sure that there was an exact time that I could pinpoint to JJ becoming my friend, he just did. One day he decided that we were friends and “so it was written and so it shall be done.” Game nights, dinner out, movie nights, and barbeques… it was as if he was an activities coordinator for a while until his targets forgot that we weren’t all lifelong friends. His open heart, crazy laugh, and eager acceptance of each of us just as we are made it difficult to do anything other than love him. So… that is what I did.
I am very thankful for his seek and destroy (or befriend as the case may be) approach to making friends; I wouldn’t trade him for anything in the world!
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
You’re amazing just the way you are.
Those who interact with me on a regular basis hear, see, and (I hope) believe that I think the world of them. I strive to make sure every person I come into contact with knows that they are loved and worthy of being loved simply because they exist. I truly believe that every person has the potential to change the world and has the power to contribute daily to the beauty of the world we live in. Exactly the way they are. Right this moment. No qualifiers in sight.
However, for some reason, I have refused to accept this about myself. How can a self proclaimed princess not believe she is wonderful??? Well, I am a walking contradiction, I’ve said that many times. Princesses can be a bit stubborn and obtuse. I humbly admit that I, routinely, contribute to the validity of that statement. You see, while I wholeheartedly believe these wonderful things about others, it is REALLY hard to convince myself that these statements also apply to me. Completely irrational and asinine; I know, I know.
But… I have also said that growth and change is essential to life. Seeing as how it is virtually impossible to move forward while digging my heels in the ground, today, I will relent. I am going to, at least for today, believe about myself what I believe about others. With grace, a little help from my Fairy Grandmother, and a light sprinkling of stardust; today I accept that I am fearfully and wonderfully made which makes me so much more than “enough.”
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
~Psalm 139:14
However, for some reason, I have refused to accept this about myself. How can a self proclaimed princess not believe she is wonderful??? Well, I am a walking contradiction, I’ve said that many times. Princesses can be a bit stubborn and obtuse. I humbly admit that I, routinely, contribute to the validity of that statement. You see, while I wholeheartedly believe these wonderful things about others, it is REALLY hard to convince myself that these statements also apply to me. Completely irrational and asinine; I know, I know.
But… I have also said that growth and change is essential to life. Seeing as how it is virtually impossible to move forward while digging my heels in the ground, today, I will relent. I am going to, at least for today, believe about myself what I believe about others. With grace, a little help from my Fairy Grandmother, and a light sprinkling of stardust; today I accept that I am fearfully and wonderfully made which makes me so much more than “enough.”
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
~Psalm 139:14
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
The Taste of Magic
While not common among princesses, I actually like being in the kitchen. I am not sure why princesses don’t find themselves in kitchens more often. In my opinion, the kitchen is one of the best places to be! Peace, clarity, and honesty are found in the kitchen. In the kitchen, there is no space for masks or facades. The kitchen is quite frequently the site of experiments, learning, counseling, loving, introspection, and good old fashioned work. And, of course, there is food in the kitchen… I like food.
One of my favorite things to do in the kitchen is to bake. There is magic in baking. Did you know that? How else would you explain the gathering of seemingly pedestrian elements in a particular manner and amount, culminating in an end product of love, comfort, and sustenance? I think that is why I am drawn to it.
As with all magic, it is not uncommon for things to go awry while I am practicing and developing new delights. But even when things go wrong, the act itself still has magical healing abilities. Methodically moving from step to step in a well rehearsed dance allows my mind to wander. I go back to happy memories of the comfort and safety of childhood. Plans and dreams of the future are conceived and create hope. I look back on recent events and relationships evaluating my choices. My mind wanders to wherever my heart needs it to be.
Now, here is a secret that is not readily shared by bakers, the magic is not complete until someone else tastes what has been baked. Good or bad, this is a must! Otherwise, the magic is lost, my work is for naught, and all I have to show is a big mess and lots of dishes to wash. (The magic in washing dishes is very much debatable.) However, when shared, the magic reaches its full potential!
Once the baking is complete and the dishes are done, feelings of accomplishment and contentment wash over me. My heart is light, my soul is rested, and all is right in the world. I have found and lived, at least briefly, the meaning of life once again.
I have created. I have given. I have loved.
One of my favorite things to do in the kitchen is to bake. There is magic in baking. Did you know that? How else would you explain the gathering of seemingly pedestrian elements in a particular manner and amount, culminating in an end product of love, comfort, and sustenance? I think that is why I am drawn to it.
As with all magic, it is not uncommon for things to go awry while I am practicing and developing new delights. But even when things go wrong, the act itself still has magical healing abilities. Methodically moving from step to step in a well rehearsed dance allows my mind to wander. I go back to happy memories of the comfort and safety of childhood. Plans and dreams of the future are conceived and create hope. I look back on recent events and relationships evaluating my choices. My mind wanders to wherever my heart needs it to be.
Now, here is a secret that is not readily shared by bakers, the magic is not complete until someone else tastes what has been baked. Good or bad, this is a must! Otherwise, the magic is lost, my work is for naught, and all I have to show is a big mess and lots of dishes to wash. (The magic in washing dishes is very much debatable.) However, when shared, the magic reaches its full potential!
Once the baking is complete and the dishes are done, feelings of accomplishment and contentment wash over me. My heart is light, my soul is rested, and all is right in the world. I have found and lived, at least briefly, the meaning of life once again.
I have created. I have given. I have loved.
Friday, March 30, 2012
Either way, you turn blue and pass out.
Princesses often find themselves weighing and evaluating ideas that many people never feel the need to ponder. Being an insomniac, this princess quite frequently has more than enough time to consider the meaning of life, not to mention all the things in the world that could be made better by the addition of purple and/or sparkles. (Sometimes purple and sparkles are just too much together… but this is a VERY rare occasion.)
One night, while the rest of the world was peacefully sleeping, I was awake and engaged in a moment of introspection and self reflection. As I was contemplating the world and how I fit in to it, I discovered a piece of wisdom that stuck with me.
Sometimes the world is so big it takes your breath away.
Sometimes the world is so small you can’t breathe.
Either way, you turn blue and pass out.
Essentially, life is hard and sometimes knocks you down. But, once you wake back up, you get back up! Tenacity and flexibility are the some of the most effective tools to cutting your own path in the world.
Metaphorically (and on occasion literally) I have turned blue and passed out. It is not very princess like, but, hey… it happens. Upon waking, though, I usually find the world is not so scary. Each time this happens, I find myself surrounded by people I love, and who love me, ready and waiting to help me stand back up. Those people and their faith in me are what give me the courage to be tenacious and flexible.
After all, courage comes from knowing love is waiting on the other side of scary.
One night, while the rest of the world was peacefully sleeping, I was awake and engaged in a moment of introspection and self reflection. As I was contemplating the world and how I fit in to it, I discovered a piece of wisdom that stuck with me.
Sometimes the world is so big it takes your breath away.
Sometimes the world is so small you can’t breathe.
Either way, you turn blue and pass out.
Essentially, life is hard and sometimes knocks you down. But, once you wake back up, you get back up! Tenacity and flexibility are the some of the most effective tools to cutting your own path in the world.
Metaphorically (and on occasion literally) I have turned blue and passed out. It is not very princess like, but, hey… it happens. Upon waking, though, I usually find the world is not so scary. Each time this happens, I find myself surrounded by people I love, and who love me, ready and waiting to help me stand back up. Those people and their faith in me are what give me the courage to be tenacious and flexible.
After all, courage comes from knowing love is waiting on the other side of scary.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Almost Seeing...
Princesses meet many people in their day to day lives and I am no different in this respect. Some people, though, take a while to come into focus. SA was one of those people for me.
SA and I had been acquaintances for several months (and later realized we had met a couple years earlier) prior to the moment we knew we had found a kindred spirit. We had similar interests and involvements, overlapping social circles and common friends, and pleasantly exchanged greetings when meeting. All in all, I think we qualified as completely courteous contacts. Until one fateful November afternoon…
I arrived in full princess fashion (i.e. late) to a BBQ for the young adults group I was a member of at our church. I wandered around the deck, being polite and greeting everyone, and finally deciding on a place appropriate to pronounce a throne. The afternoon was going very well with lively chatter and general levity, when one of the members of the group addressed another member who happened to work in the same facility. The exchange went something like this:
Luis: “Oh, Rachel! I almost saw you the other day!”
I arrived in full princess fashion (i.e. late) to a BBQ for the young adults group I was a member of at our church. I wandered around the deck, being polite and greeting everyone, and finally deciding on a place appropriate to pronounce a throne. The afternoon was going very well with lively chatter and general levity, when one of the members of the group addressed another member who happened to work in the same facility. The exchange went something like this:
Luis: “Oh, Rachel! I almost saw you the other day!”
*Princess Brandi snickers*
Rachel: “Oh yeah? ”
Luis: ""Yeah, I almost saw you at the gym."
*Princess Brandi and SA start chuckling*
Luis: “I saw your car it he parking lot, but I did not see you in the gym. I must have just missed you”
Rachel: “Oh that’s too bad. Come to think of it I almost saw you too! I noticed your car as I was coming out of the gym."
*Catching each other’s eyes, Princess Brandi and SA loose all composure and erupt in to full laughter *
At this point, SA and I were laughing so hard we could barely breathe and the rest of the group just stared at us as if we had gone insane. We tried explaining the absurdity of “almost seeing” someone, but no one else really found it as funny as we did.
SA and I finally calmed down and began blending in with the rest of the group, but we both knew we had stumbled upon something pretty cool. Later we would recognize that moment as the day we found one of the rarest of treasures in each other. A friend that sees your world.
There is nothing almost about that kind of friend.
Luis: ""Yeah, I almost saw you at the gym."
*Princess Brandi and SA start chuckling*
Luis: “I saw your car it he parking lot, but I did not see you in the gym. I must have just missed you”
Rachel: “Oh that’s too bad. Come to think of it I almost saw you too! I noticed your car as I was coming out of the gym."
*Catching each other’s eyes, Princess Brandi and SA loose all composure and erupt in to full laughter *
Luis: “What’s so funny?”
Princess Brandi: *between gasps of laughter* “How can you almost see someone???”
Princess Brandi: *between gasps of laughter* “How can you almost see someone???”
At this point, SA and I were laughing so hard we could barely breathe and the rest of the group just stared at us as if we had gone insane. We tried explaining the absurdity of “almost seeing” someone, but no one else really found it as funny as we did.
SA and I finally calmed down and began blending in with the rest of the group, but we both knew we had stumbled upon something pretty cool. Later we would recognize that moment as the day we found one of the rarest of treasures in each other. A friend that sees your world.
There is nothing almost about that kind of friend.
Monday, March 12, 2012
Sometimes, being a Princess is not all it’s cracked up to be
On occasion, my Princess self-righteousness has caused me problems. Indignation and intolerance for perceived stupidity is, unfortunately, a very volatile and short fused emotion for this princess.
Take today for example. An innocent staff meeting discussing the upcoming performance evaluation standards transformed me from a pleasant (albeit sleepy) mild mannered princess into a sardonic and cynical green creature capable of spewing venom and squealing in high pitched tones audible by only bats and small pets. My opinion was well known by all in the room and subsequently by a number of acquaintances via various modes of communication. Let’s just say I was not happy.
Now, it should be noted that the information presented at the meeting I, by my account, still classified as asinine and the product of paranoia on the parts of the higher ups, but my reaction was not one of grace and composure. Instead of politely enduring the assault on my common sense and professional ethics and then quietly developing an exit plan, I felt it necessary to let my view on the matter be known.
There were no repercussions from my shrill objections and my opinion was not uncommon among the group in attendance; however, a Princess should not behave in such a way. Lesson learned for the day: Grace and Obstinance do not make good bedfellows.
Take today for example. An innocent staff meeting discussing the upcoming performance evaluation standards transformed me from a pleasant (albeit sleepy) mild mannered princess into a sardonic and cynical green creature capable of spewing venom and squealing in high pitched tones audible by only bats and small pets. My opinion was well known by all in the room and subsequently by a number of acquaintances via various modes of communication. Let’s just say I was not happy.
Now, it should be noted that the information presented at the meeting I, by my account, still classified as asinine and the product of paranoia on the parts of the higher ups, but my reaction was not one of grace and composure. Instead of politely enduring the assault on my common sense and professional ethics and then quietly developing an exit plan, I felt it necessary to let my view on the matter be known.
There were no repercussions from my shrill objections and my opinion was not uncommon among the group in attendance; however, a Princess should not behave in such a way. Lesson learned for the day: Grace and Obstinance do not make good bedfellows.
Friday, March 9, 2012
I feel you
I feel you.
You haven’t touched me yet.
And still, I feel you.
As if your soul stepped ahead of you,
Impatient as your body took its time.
You exhale slowly. Deliberately.
Warming the nape of my neck.
Your breath wrapping around
Stroking my cheek.
Waves of excitement rolling through me.
Eagerness for your touch permeating every part of me.
I hear the faint rustle of cotton.
Your arms are moving toward me.
Soon I will feel the strength and power of you
wrapped around me enveloping me
I am giddy with anticipation.
Fingers finally make contact.
A current of desire and heat races through me.
The wholeness of your body collides with mine
You bring me into you.
My senses hypersensitive
Desperate to take in as much of you as possible.
The smell of your skin
The scent of your hair
The rhythmic pounding of your heart
Euphoria spreads like a drug.
It floods every cell with desire.
The desire to possess you
and to be possessed by you.
Your body pushed against me tells me this is not a dream.
You are here.
You are real.
You haven’t touched me yet.
And still, I feel you.
As if your soul stepped ahead of you,
Impatient as your body took its time.
You exhale slowly. Deliberately.
Warming the nape of my neck.
Your breath wrapping around
Stroking my cheek.
Waves of excitement rolling through me.
Eagerness for your touch permeating every part of me.
I hear the faint rustle of cotton.
Your arms are moving toward me.
Soon I will feel the strength and power of you
wrapped around me enveloping me
I am giddy with anticipation.
Fingers finally make contact.
A current of desire and heat races through me.
The wholeness of your body collides with mine
You bring me into you.
My senses hypersensitive
Desperate to take in as much of you as possible.
The smell of your skin
The scent of your hair
The rhythmic pounding of your heart
Euphoria spreads like a drug.
It floods every cell with desire.
The desire to possess you
and to be possessed by you.
Your body pushed against me tells me this is not a dream.
You are here.
You are real.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Listen! My beloved!
This morning I woke up with Aaron Shust’s “My Hope Is In You" on repeat in my head. Specifically, the lines “My hope is in you, Lord, all the day long. I won’t be shaken by drought or storm. A peace surpassing understanding is my song.” I like the song, and it is certainly uplifting so … great way to start the day, right? Well, it gets better.
I get to work and meet with my first client. The session goes well, comes to a close, and I take a little non-work breather before moving on to the next task at hand. Wandering the internet, I decide to take a look at today’s mass readings.
In the first reading (Jeremiah 17:5-10) I see, “Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose hope is the LORD” Huh… coincidence? Then I move to the Psalm (Psalm 1:1-6) with the refrain, “Blessed are they who hope in the Lord.” Hmmm… ok….
Then all of a sudden it hits me. That song is not the product of a random synapses firing in my brain to produce a memory. Those readings are not coincidental. It's all intentional.
It is an overwhelming and amazing feeling to realize that, the little voice in the back of your mind, is actually the Creator of the Universe whispering sweet nothings into the ear of His beloved.
I get to work and meet with my first client. The session goes well, comes to a close, and I take a little non-work breather before moving on to the next task at hand. Wandering the internet, I decide to take a look at today’s mass readings.
In the first reading (Jeremiah 17:5-10) I see, “Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose hope is the LORD” Huh… coincidence? Then I move to the Psalm (Psalm 1:1-6) with the refrain, “Blessed are they who hope in the Lord.” Hmmm… ok….
Then all of a sudden it hits me. That song is not the product of a random synapses firing in my brain to produce a memory. Those readings are not coincidental. It's all intentional.
It is an overwhelming and amazing feeling to realize that, the little voice in the back of your mind, is actually the Creator of the Universe whispering sweet nothings into the ear of His beloved.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Nerds: The Unsung Heroes of Princesses Everywhere
Being a self-proclaimed princess has some disadvantages. Not everyone sees my worth and the things that I hold dear do not always translate well to the rest of society. Thankfully, In my life I have stumbled across some charmingly odd individuals who not only accept my "outside of normal" approach to life, but actually embrace and encourage it. While they may not quite experience the same joy I do from performing full choreography while completing most any of life’s mundane deeds, they delight in my quirks and find me rather entertaining.
I find them a fascinating people, little known to the general population. They speak a language unknown to the masses and routinely shy from the public eye. Their abilities and capabilities are often coveted by mainstreamers and frequently harnessed by the government. While I like to call them by their given names, most people call them nerds.
Two, in particular, have become rather integral parts in the shenanigans of this princess. JJ and SA appeared separately in my world and through a series of adventures, misadventures, drinking, and silly songs have become some of the most important people in my life. They frequently speak a language completely foreign to me but are so very patient while I learn. They stand by me even when I erupt into a full on, category five, temper tantrum; offer unconditional love and support the best they know how; and when lofty dreams crumble at my feet, they manage to make me laugh when all I really want to do is cry.
So, while they not be celebrated champions by the rest of the world, they will always be my nerds in shining armor.
Thursday, March 1, 2012
A Princess is as a Princess Does...
I am, well, different. To go all Mathlete on you, I am a statistical outlier on multiple occasions. That old adage “there is an exception to every rule.” Yeah, that’s me.
Of course, I *look* just like most of the population; appropriate number of eyes, ears, legs, arms, feet, hands. I come from a model family, both of my parents are healthy and still as in love with each other as they were when they got married 36 years ago. I have a house and a dog, two actually. Dogs that is. I have a good job, good friends, and a car that doesn’t (normally) fall apart. Really, I am the picture of normal.
But, see, therein lies the caveat; looks are deceiving. Now don’t get me wrong, “normal” is fine. Normal is perfectly acceptable, and frankly, by definition routinely accepted. There is nothing wrong with normal and I am sure there are many people in this word who are completely happy with being normal. But you have to admit… it’s kind of boring.
Unique is much more fun! Why be ordinary when there are wonderfully colorful, weird, and exciting things to see and do at every turn? Give me one good reason as to why I can’t sing ABBA and disco around my house in my pajamas on a Tuesday night! Why shouldn’t I have purple hair and wear a tiara while grocery shopping? Who says I can’t invent my own holidays?
Now, being a princess, that is not boring at all. Princesses don’t have to be “normal.” As a matter of fact, they are expected to be the complete opposite of common! A princess has the world as her oyster and beauty is all around her. Yes, princesses are known for being spoiled and prone to temper tantrums (which I am) but that is not really what defines a princess. A Princess is kind and loving, giving to those in need, rejoicing in the success of others, and concerned for the well being of those around her. A Princess knows the joy of love, the heartache of the loss of dreams, expect the very best of people, and rise above adversity. A Princess is strong and resourceful; they fight for what they believe in and will not stop until they succeed. A Princess knows her worth.
So, maybe I am not a princess by the literal definition of the word. I do not have a ruling family lineage, per se. But seeing as I live in a country without a monarchy, I think it is perfectly reasonable to proclaim myself a princess. TIARAS for ALL!!!
Of course, I *look* just like most of the population; appropriate number of eyes, ears, legs, arms, feet, hands. I come from a model family, both of my parents are healthy and still as in love with each other as they were when they got married 36 years ago. I have a house and a dog, two actually. Dogs that is. I have a good job, good friends, and a car that doesn’t (normally) fall apart. Really, I am the picture of normal.
But, see, therein lies the caveat; looks are deceiving. Now don’t get me wrong, “normal” is fine. Normal is perfectly acceptable, and frankly, by definition routinely accepted. There is nothing wrong with normal and I am sure there are many people in this word who are completely happy with being normal. But you have to admit… it’s kind of boring.
Unique is much more fun! Why be ordinary when there are wonderfully colorful, weird, and exciting things to see and do at every turn? Give me one good reason as to why I can’t sing ABBA and disco around my house in my pajamas on a Tuesday night! Why shouldn’t I have purple hair and wear a tiara while grocery shopping? Who says I can’t invent my own holidays?
Now, being a princess, that is not boring at all. Princesses don’t have to be “normal.” As a matter of fact, they are expected to be the complete opposite of common! A princess has the world as her oyster and beauty is all around her. Yes, princesses are known for being spoiled and prone to temper tantrums (which I am) but that is not really what defines a princess. A Princess is kind and loving, giving to those in need, rejoicing in the success of others, and concerned for the well being of those around her. A Princess knows the joy of love, the heartache of the loss of dreams, expect the very best of people, and rise above adversity. A Princess is strong and resourceful; they fight for what they believe in and will not stop until they succeed. A Princess knows her worth.
So, maybe I am not a princess by the literal definition of the word. I do not have a ruling family lineage, per se. But seeing as I live in a country without a monarchy, I think it is perfectly reasonable to proclaim myself a princess. TIARAS for ALL!!!
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